Promises, Promises + Family Worship #9
Do you ever get yourself into trouble with the promises you make? I know I have. There are people on the news all the time who have gotten themselves caught in a web of lies. How do we live as a person who keeps their word? And what is the value of being someone who can be counted on?
I’m working on a tight deadline today. Tuesdays are always a busy day at the office with a number of tight deadlines that have to be met for the church. Probably the most important deadline I have today is the promise I made to my wife. I have promised to be home by 3pm.
I am not known for my punctuality for getting home from the office. Sometimes I get so engrossed in my work or study that I completely lose track of time. Other times the horrendous traffic from all the construction in our area doubles or triples my drive time. Still other times an urgent matter comes up that needs to be attended to. No matter the reason, it is important to try my best to keep my word to my wife in regards to when I will be home.
What’s the big deal? So I’m a little late? Well, my wife has carefully structured her day around my promise. If I forget or fail to keep my word it is going to mess up her plans. This promise of timeliness is just a small example of a bigger concept.
In our various relationships we make promises, whether they are spoken, written or sometimes just understood. We might have a contract with our employer. We have vows with our spouse. There might be unspoken bonds of trust with friends or family members. Failing to keep any of those promises would have significant consequences.
Children especially tend to be perceptive of promises. I know our five year old is extremely observant and can recall promises that were made months ago. Being a husband made me more aware of the promises I make and the things that I say. Being a Dad has taught me to be acutely aware of the promises I make and the long term impact of my words.
When we don’t keep our promises, even small ones, it starts to erode the fabric of trust that holds our relationships together. Friends might start to doubt the depth of our commitment and friendship. Spouses might start to question and doubt our words, actions and intentions. Children might harbor resentment and bitterness over years of broken promises.
It seems the best course of action is carefully measuring our commitments and promises. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus in speaking about oaths, said that believers should simply let their words be true. If you say you’ll be somewhere, then show up. If you offer to help, follow through. The old saying is true, a man is only as good as his word.
A few thoughts on being a person who is true to their word:
- Write it down. This might sound a bit silly, but I have started writing down certain things that I have told people I would do because I know I could easily forget. I find this to be especially useful when I tell someone I will pray for them. Quite often I will say, “I’ll be praying for you.” I need to follow through on that commitment. Technology is great for these kinds of reminders. I can easily pop out my iPhone and tell Siri to remind me about something when I get home, or to the office, or at a certain time.
- Really consider what you are committing to before you make a promise. It is very easy to get over committed. I am the king of getting in over my head. I have really been working on trying to think long-term about promises I am making. The fine art of delegation and scheduling is also important.
- Sometimes you will fail. Despite best efforts, things won’t always work out the way we had planned for them to. My best advice is to communicate when failure is imminent. Take for instance my 3pm deadline today. After school errands with my daughter took longer than expected and I knew we were going to be late, a quick text update fixed everything.
In today’s family worship guide, God makes a HUGE promise to Abram. He even changes his name to Abraham as part of the covenant. This promise still impacts us today. It is a good thing that God is a lot better at keeping His promises than I am. This is an excellent study to look at with your family. If you are having trust issues within your family, this might be just the thing you need to get some communication going. Enjoy >>> Week 9 – Faith of Abraham – Part 6